“第一次是在2013年10月18号，那时才大一
- 人在纽约
- 2023-05-10 07:17:10
“第一次是在2013年10月18号，那时才大一。我自己在宿舍，因为之前吃了一堆万圣节糖果，所以就催吐了。吐完感觉特别爽，我还想着我发现了新诀窍，它似乎是一种减肥的方法。但它变得非常厉害，也非常频繁。两天后我第二次催吐，很快就频繁到几乎每餐饭。我执迷于看着数字下降，完全掌控不了节奏了。那段时间我总是心不在焉，也很消沉。我不能专心听课，也不跟朋友出去玩。有五个月，我是完全失控的。后来我总算得到了帮助，开始谈起这件事。而说的越多，我就夺回越多的控制权。当它不再是秘密时，饮食障碍就没什么能量了。我现在好多了，但也还一直在恢复中。几周前我复发了，那是几个月来第一次。虽然我很沮丧，依然提醒自己这不是世界末日，我还没失去在过去四年里取得的所有进步，我只需要保持乐观，继续敞开心扉把它说出来。”
“My first time was October 18th, 2013. I was a freshman in college. I was alone in my dorm room and I’d just eaten a bunch of Halloween candy. So I purged it. I felt great afterward. I thought I’d discovered a new tool. It seemed like a way to stop gaining weight. But it became very powerful, very quickly. My second time was two days later. Soon it became most meals. I became addicted to watching the numbers drop. I lost all power over it. I was dizzy and depressed all the time. I couldn’t focus in class or go out with friends. For five months, I lost all control. Then I finally got help. I started talking about it. And the more I talked about it, the more control I got back. The eating disorder lost its power when it stopped being a secret. I’m much better now, but I’ll always be recovering. A few weeks ago I had a relapse. It was the first time in months. Even though I was disappointed, I reminded myself that it wasn’t the end of the world. I haven’t lost all the progress I’ve made over the past four years. I just need to stay positive. And keep talking about it.”
“My first time was October 18th, 2013. I was a freshman in college. I was alone in my dorm room and I’d just eaten a bunch of Halloween candy. So I purged it. I felt great afterward. I thought I’d discovered a new tool. It seemed like a way to stop gaining weight. But it became very powerful, very quickly. My second time was two days later. Soon it became most meals. I became addicted to watching the numbers drop. I lost all power over it. I was dizzy and depressed all the time. I couldn’t focus in class or go out with friends. For five months, I lost all control. Then I finally got help. I started talking about it. And the more I talked about it, the more control I got back. The eating disorder lost its power when it stopped being a secret. I’m much better now, but I’ll always be recovering. A few weeks ago I had a relapse. It was the first time in months. Even though I was disappointed, I reminded myself that it wasn’t the end of the world. I haven’t lost all the progress I’ve made over the past four years. I just need to stay positive. And keep talking about it.”
